"You're in the Army now"

[eumelia]

Yeah, so being in miluim feels like regular service again, only a whole lot more free since no one is actually my superior officer and I'm there because I'm actually needed and not because it's mandatory.
Being the paranoiac I am I'll refrain from talking about what I actually do while at the desk, suffice to say I'm glad I'm lacking hair since I'd have ripped almost all of it out of stress and frustration. hagar_972 will crack up when I talk to her tomorrow.
I was quite amazed at how competent I was on my first day back, having the person who trained me sit the shift with me was the bomb, add to that, that hagar_972 and I have a kind of natural simpatico it was quite the rush, I even manned the station on my own for a little.
On Tuesday I sat with one of the new soldiers who man's my station and it was such a pleasure - cool under fire doesn't even begin, afterwords it's a bit of a crash, but working with him was amazing, great chemistry with that one and being the more "experience" I did the majority of the more intense stuff, though he did most of the talking with people who came to us for info which was nice since being back reminded me why I was so happy to leave.

Having the perspective needed to view my service critically I've come to the conclusion I took things way too seriously and let people get to me simply because I allowed them too. Add to that my individualism has matured greatly in the past 10 months being back with the soldiers was quite an experience. It's also amazing how being outside the system makes you blind to rank, some people are naturally blind to authority *coughhagarcough*, but me I'm a little more shy and tend to get all "yes, sure, ah ha, whatever you say* making me a pretty good little soldier though I never call anyone "sir" or "ma'am" unless I'm joking.
So being back and being spoken to as a "soldier" didn't sit well with me, especially my former CO who is just an asshole and is probably the son to two very hard-done-by parents. He's one of those anal "everything must be superhuman perfect" types who just makes people feel like crap since, ya know, he treats people like crap.
Haven't had a whole lot of interaction with my old office (mador), which is only for the best, since it would seem ever since my old direct Officer left my mador has only gone down-hill, but then again Captain Asshole (he's not a major yet) is their CO and is a nightmare both war and in peace since he doesn't believe in peace and it's a war every damn day with him.
Plus they forced me to wear a uniform, they could told me to come in one and I would have worm my own one that actually fits me properly! It's actually fun coming in uniform since it's one of those old cotton ones that are actually quite comfortable and kept me warm in the freezing cold of the AC controlled rooms!
Plus bracelets and dark nail polish (no to mention sporting a hair style most of the men are wearing) I finally look like the soldier I always wanted to look like, with political buttons and everything - sort of like Matthew Modine in "Full Metal Jacket".

The general situation is pretty crappy since too many rockets are landing in Israel and we are very reluctant (for obvious reasons) to get into Lebanon on foot, no one wants to go back in there, it's just too traumatic for this country to go through that again. There's a limit to the amount of action each side can give and eventually something is going to have to change, somehow.
Hopefully I'll not be completely burned out by the end of this shindig, I mean being with Hagar at the station is the best, plus when we're both together the station is at maximum since we're both the oldest who hold this station.
So being back is fun.
In a masochistic kinda way.

P.S.
Pastel pink so works with dark olive green, it certainly made me stand out, even more than my shouting and hair cut :)

Comments

[lifeofresearch.livejournal.com]

Thank you for your observation and opinions you are just so lovable.

[eumelia.livejournal.com]

Glad you're enjoying my take on things :)

[hagar-972.livejournal.com]

You're giving me too much credit, girl.

[cziganybriella.livejournal.com]

Welcome aboard. I always like new friends. Keep in mind any time I insult the military or say I hate the military what I really mean is I hate Dave, savvy?

[eumelia.livejournal.com]

I understand the logic :) And believe me, until the shit is over on this side of the world you'll be hearing a lot of complaints about a lot of things 'round here.

[ayellowbirds.livejournal.com]

My half-sister, half-brother, and mother were all born in Kfar Saba. My mother avoided military service by having dual citizenship and growing up in the United States; my sister's difficulty in dealing with stress was pronounced enough that it prevented her from serving. I have never met my brother, who i have been told has little love for our father.

I worry about him, every time i remember his name. I worry about my sister, i worry about their spouses, their children. I worry about my aunt, whose son has only recently returned to care for her in her poor health. I worry about those who serve, those who have, those who will, and those who never shall. I worry about what my oldest niece is learning as she grows up, whether she is sharp enough to decide on her own.

Knowing there are people like you over there, i worry a little less. Thank you.