Good Friday Morning
Oct. 26th, 2012 10:40 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
eumeliaThis week had been so hellish, I don't even know where to begin.
So I'll start at the beginning.
Sunday should have just been cancelled, I was a walking disaster and I still can't explain why everything went wrong, but it did. I mean, okay, so there are mornings you wake up feeling a bit ill and you skip breakfast, but you're also too exhausted to shower, your hair is a mess and you thank god you wear hats on a regular basis so by the time you get to work (to which you were 15 minutes late) your hair is at least flat.
If you follow me on twitter you know I had a company trip to the middle of fucking nowhere. The details of which we weren't given at any time until it was actually happening. The week before I went to our office admin and begged her for the info, I nearly cried, because I'm perfectly willing to go on this stupid fucking asinine trip if I know what's going to happen.
As you may imagine I made it no secret that I was not happy about going on an over night trip, of which I received no information other than what clothes to bring. Again, none of which gave me any information regarding the activities.
Add to that that I was due to get my period while on the fucking trip (which I did, making the experience all the more, you know, fucking fun).
I will admit that I enjoyed the sunrise over the desert, which I would have liked knowing about in advance so I could stop being anxious about the whole fucking company trip.
We stayed in a commercialised Bedouin compound, which had the double whammy of being both appropriative and exploitative of the Bedouin culture and of utterly prettifying the reality of their existence as second hand citizens in Israel. Sorry I couldn't enjoy the lecture, Sir, I'm sure the minimum wage you get for lecturing to a bunch of Israeli tourists isn't your main source of income considering you have 4 wives and 18 children - and yeah, I have no doubt your daughters are happy to be worth 7 camels. I wish I was lying, or joking.
My co-worker said I was barometer for misogyny. I think I'm just good at seeing through tourist bullshit and know enough about the reality of the Bedouin population (both transient and permanent) to not want to hear what a Bedouin man has to say about honour and respect of "his" women.
So that was fun, add to that the utterly sexist (Western style!) rock opera about the world of High Tech (the world I currently work in) and I had the best time ever!
Ever.
That's the thing, you know, I know I'm an "extremist" when it comes to this shit, I'm bothered by sexism and heterosexism in a way that will always ruin other people's "fun". I'm a stick in the mud, so you know, I moan and groan and do my best to grit my teeth through it.
I didn't mention this to my Boss when she asked for feedback about the trip, but I mentioned the anxiety and the fact that the head of HR told me off for not coming directly to her if I wanted the information about the trip (which, you know, makes her an asshole), when I mentioned to the head of HR that I was anxious about the trip.
You know, I'd rather not talk about my anxieties about these kind of field trips to people who don't have my interests at heart! I mean, shock at that, right?
As I said, the sunrise was beautiful. I'm not sure it was worth the anxiety of not knowing in advance that this was the plan.
The massage that we were given after breakfast would have been better if the masseuse wasn't an asshole and didn't verbally harass me while I was basically trapped under his hands. Seriously, I didn't need to know what "blowjob" is in Spanish and you didn't need to call me "Sweetheart" when you were done. It was skeevy and icky.
The cherry on top was that at lunch my team + other colleagues sat together one of my team-mates asked if I don't like mushrooms because they look like penises.
So that was fun.
And due to my anxiety I totally crapped out on what I was supposed to accomplish this week for work, which made me feel like shit, even though I think my Boss was sympathetic.
That was my week. I'm so glad it's over.
So I'll start at the beginning.
Sunday should have just been cancelled, I was a walking disaster and I still can't explain why everything went wrong, but it did. I mean, okay, so there are mornings you wake up feeling a bit ill and you skip breakfast, but you're also too exhausted to shower, your hair is a mess and you thank god you wear hats on a regular basis so by the time you get to work (to which you were 15 minutes late) your hair is at least flat.
If you follow me on twitter you know I had a company trip to the middle of fucking nowhere. The details of which we weren't given at any time until it was actually happening. The week before I went to our office admin and begged her for the info, I nearly cried, because I'm perfectly willing to go on this stupid fucking asinine trip if I know what's going to happen.
As you may imagine I made it no secret that I was not happy about going on an over night trip, of which I received no information other than what clothes to bring. Again, none of which gave me any information regarding the activities.
Add to that that I was due to get my period while on the fucking trip (which I did, making the experience all the more, you know, fucking fun).
I will admit that I enjoyed the sunrise over the desert, which I would have liked knowing about in advance so I could stop being anxious about the whole fucking company trip.
We stayed in a commercialised Bedouin compound, which had the double whammy of being both appropriative and exploitative of the Bedouin culture and of utterly prettifying the reality of their existence as second hand citizens in Israel. Sorry I couldn't enjoy the lecture, Sir, I'm sure the minimum wage you get for lecturing to a bunch of Israeli tourists isn't your main source of income considering you have 4 wives and 18 children - and yeah, I have no doubt your daughters are happy to be worth 7 camels. I wish I was lying, or joking.
My co-worker said I was barometer for misogyny. I think I'm just good at seeing through tourist bullshit and know enough about the reality of the Bedouin population (both transient and permanent) to not want to hear what a Bedouin man has to say about honour and respect of "his" women.
So that was fun, add to that the utterly sexist (Western style!) rock opera about the world of High Tech (the world I currently work in) and I had the best time ever!
Ever.
That's the thing, you know, I know I'm an "extremist" when it comes to this shit, I'm bothered by sexism and heterosexism in a way that will always ruin other people's "fun". I'm a stick in the mud, so you know, I moan and groan and do my best to grit my teeth through it.
I didn't mention this to my Boss when she asked for feedback about the trip, but I mentioned the anxiety and the fact that the head of HR told me off for not coming directly to her if I wanted the information about the trip (which, you know, makes her an asshole), when I mentioned to the head of HR that I was anxious about the trip.
You know, I'd rather not talk about my anxieties about these kind of field trips to people who don't have my interests at heart! I mean, shock at that, right?
As I said, the sunrise was beautiful. I'm not sure it was worth the anxiety of not knowing in advance that this was the plan.
The massage that we were given after breakfast would have been better if the masseuse wasn't an asshole and didn't verbally harass me while I was basically trapped under his hands. Seriously, I didn't need to know what "blowjob" is in Spanish and you didn't need to call me "Sweetheart" when you were done. It was skeevy and icky.
The cherry on top was that at lunch my team + other colleagues sat together one of my team-mates asked if I don't like mushrooms because they look like penises.
So that was fun.
And due to my anxiety I totally crapped out on what I was supposed to accomplish this week for work, which made me feel like shit, even though I think my Boss was sympathetic.
That was my week. I'm so glad it's over.
no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 11:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 11:36 am (UTC)Yeah, it could have been worse. It could have been way, way, better.
no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 03:28 pm (UTC)Oh, sweetie, what a rough week! I'm so sorry you had to endure that, and I hope that your weekend will help you get back to equilibrium. *MORE HUGS*
(If it helps, maybe we could imagine Steve and Danny ganging up on Chin for an epic tickle fight? It starts with Steve and Danny, right (when doesn't it?), and Chin tries to get them to knock it off (because two grown men rolling around on the floor is a recipe for disaster) but his mistake was trying to get between them, because they turn on him, and oh, fuck, Chin is even more ticklish than Steve and Danny's sneaky and fast and it isn't long before Chin's a giggling, quivering mess on the floor, before they're all lying in a puppy pile in the hallway between the living room and the lanai. They finally wind down, Chin pinning one of Steve's hands to the floor with his hip and holding one of Danny's elbows under his arm, Danny panting against the back of Chin's neck and Chin resting his forehead against Steve's knee, Steve half-draped over them both and all of them sweaty and dripping tears.)
no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 03:36 pm (UTC)(AND OH BOYS! You always make me feel better with your quick feel good fics! Thank you so much!)
no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 04:00 pm (UTC)We are moving offices next Friday, so this week the big crates and rolling bookshelves got delivered, ERGO: There is much packing and shit to be done. I need to get going on it, but I have also needed to get emails answered and such this morning, so I'm not very far yet. We're all quite curmudgeonly about it, though. :D
no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 04:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 04:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 04:12 pm (UTC)So yeah, AUGH!
no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 04:49 pm (UTC)After my last fnu outing with the company I was working with in 2003, I ended up lambasting HR, the CEO, and anyone else I could think of at the company about showing some extremely misogynist and horrible short Guy Ritchie films during the rah-rah session. I figured I already knew my job ended at the end of the year, so I could afford to kick a fuss when others who might have been just as offended as I'd been might not be able to.
no subject
Date: 2012-10-26 04:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-10-27 09:35 pm (UTC)Of course, as we know, what actually happens is another story. We're story you had to go though that kind of anxiety, misogyny, and general bullpucky. Hopefully you'll be able to get warning next time and spend most of it snarking their feeble attempts to make you all magically into team players.
no subject
Date: 2012-10-28 08:02 am (UTC)Yeah, next time, hopefully a long long time from now, I'll go to HR and tell them if they don't give me all the info in advance I shan't be responsible for my actions.