What The Eff? No, Seriously, What?!
Oct. 21st, 2011 09:54 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
eumeliaGoddamn! Life is kicking my ass.
I have been trying to write about Zachary Quinto and his coming out for days now, because the significance of why he came out, i.e. because it was the socially responsible thing to do, is a clear challenge towards other closeted celebrities.
I think anyone who can come out should, but I also understand why you wouldn't or don't. As it is, being out is more a negotiation or a process than anything else and it needs to happen over and over again.
When Quinto came out, in an interview, in which his sexuality was not the focus of the article (i.e. it wasn't about him coming out of the closet), he did it in a way I find myself doing more often than not - matter of fact and casual.
Of course, it never is, matter of fact or casual that is. You can see the person in front of you rearrange every single thought they have on you, no matter how liberal and no matter if the other person is LGBT themselves - I know this, because my thoughts rearrange themselves and reshuffle my expectations regarding this person, who has decided that the cultural assumption of heterosexuality is not something to partake it, or that living your life in which every time you talk about your life you need to make sure you don't "slip".
Regardless as to whether one is celebrity or just a person going through life and interacting with people, when a person comes out, usually, the main reason is for their own benefit.
The fact that it is the responsible and ethically correct thing to do in neither there nor there, because it is also a matter of personal choice and circumstance.
A matter of personal choice and circumstance, which, when you're a celebrity, opens you up to a whole lot of shit just because you're a gay public figure.
I find it personally offensive and disgusting, as a fangirl, as a slasher and yeah, as a gay person, that in the passing weeks, when two men (Sean Maher came out of the closet a few weeks ago), who are first and foremost genre actors, come out I encounter (via Sparkindarkness) this and I quote from his post:
I think fantasising about people, celebrities especially, as they constructed to be fantasy fodder, is fair. I think if you're going to be public about it, you show some fucking respect to the persona you're objectifying.
Attached to that persona is an actual person who is doing a job.
Fictional characters are a whole other kettle of fish, but that's not we're talking about, but it does need to be said.
Beyond the basic human decency mentioned above, I find it absolutely abhorrent that people in slash fandom, my cultural home, my intellectual playground, would actually create a meme that diminishes and marginalises gay people:
With a very distinct few, all the ideas under the cut are homophobic. The fact that the ideas that aren't homophobic are contextualised in the meme above renders them just as disgusting and infuriating.
Most of the time, when I see criticism of fandom, participatory culture and slash, I read with interest even though I am not the target audience (usually there is a whole lot of misconception and mistakes in talking about fandom - we're not all straight and we're not all women, to start with. Just saying), but the criticisms of appropriation, misogyny and fetishism are ones I do read. I read them with the knowledge that these things happen far too often and are not called on (at all or enough) in fandom.
So let me say it like this; As a gay woman, as a queer fangrrl, as a consumer of slash; reducing gay men (be they real or fictional) to a piece of meat over which one writes their masturbatory fantasies, reduces, diminishes and marginalises me and my sexuality and my culture and every other gay/lesbian/bisexual/trans/queer woman (and man) who chooses to participate in male oriented fandom.
Food for thought, that.
I have been trying to write about Zachary Quinto and his coming out for days now, because the significance of why he came out, i.e. because it was the socially responsible thing to do, is a clear challenge towards other closeted celebrities.
I think anyone who can come out should, but I also understand why you wouldn't or don't. As it is, being out is more a negotiation or a process than anything else and it needs to happen over and over again.
When Quinto came out, in an interview, in which his sexuality was not the focus of the article (i.e. it wasn't about him coming out of the closet), he did it in a way I find myself doing more often than not - matter of fact and casual.
Of course, it never is, matter of fact or casual that is. You can see the person in front of you rearrange every single thought they have on you, no matter how liberal and no matter if the other person is LGBT themselves - I know this, because my thoughts rearrange themselves and reshuffle my expectations regarding this person, who has decided that the cultural assumption of heterosexuality is not something to partake it, or that living your life in which every time you talk about your life you need to make sure you don't "slip".
Regardless as to whether one is celebrity or just a person going through life and interacting with people, when a person comes out, usually, the main reason is for their own benefit.
The fact that it is the responsible and ethically correct thing to do in neither there nor there, because it is also a matter of personal choice and circumstance.
A matter of personal choice and circumstance, which, when you're a celebrity, opens you up to a whole lot of shit just because you're a gay public figure.
I find it personally offensive and disgusting, as a fangirl, as a slasher and yeah, as a gay person, that in the passing weeks, when two men (Sean Maher came out of the closet a few weeks ago), who are first and foremost genre actors, come out I encounter (via Sparkindarkness) this and I quote from his post:
"Oh I would totally slash him!"
"brb writing that slash"
"Yaaay I have a new OTP!"
"I'm shipping him with X now"
"A new ship is born"
.... and so on so on.
Seriously - a life changing extremely powerful and personal moment, a moemnt that requires support and congratulations - and this is what is presented as support? Yay, a new fuckpuppet! Bring on the fetishisation! What does it even say about these people that the minute a gay man comes out that slashing them is their reaction?
I think fantasising about people, celebrities especially, as they constructed to be fantasy fodder, is fair. I think if you're going to be public about it, you show some fucking respect to the persona you're objectifying.
Attached to that persona is an actual person who is doing a job.
Fictional characters are a whole other kettle of fish, but that's not we're talking about, but it does need to be said.
Beyond the basic human decency mentioned above, I find it absolutely abhorrent that people in slash fandom, my cultural home, my intellectual playground, would actually create a meme that diminishes and marginalises gay people:
The "You Konw You're Addicted To Slash" meme
1. You start mentally pairing up random guys on the street.
2. You wish you had gay friends just so you could perve on them kissing their boyfriends.
3. You don’t remember the last time you read a heterosexual fiction.
4. You have developed a sexual fetish for handcuffs, leather and BDSM.
5. If you are a heterosexual girl, you keep trying to 'seme' or top your boyfriend, despite the fact that you don’t have the necessary parts.
6. You suddenly become interested in gay rights, thinking this will increase your opportunities for voyeuristic activities.
7. You try to get your friends into it, simply so you can talk to them about it without them getting that bored look on their face.
8. You keep lying about the number of hours you spend each day on the computer reading slash fiction, watching gay anime etc.
9. The most exciting moment of your life so far was when you discovered hentai manga(slash).
10. You celebrate turning 18 not because you can watch R movies, but because you’re old enough to watch movies with explicit gay sex scenes.
11. It’s the only aphrodisiac you need.
12. When your boyfriend tells you he’s gay and has been dating another man, you immediately ask if you can join in.
13. Your gay son wishes he had a normal, homophobic mother who didn’t ask him questions about his latest sexual exploits.
14. You have weird dreams of being a boy an kissing the same gender.
15. You're reading this and thinking of what you are also doing that has a connection to this!
16. You start pairing up people you saw in your television.
17. You tend to mentally accuse 'sexy' and 'hot' guys of being secretly lovers.
18. You start asking some of your friends if they have gay friends.
19. You suddenly had the urge to draw something perverted. Or try to.
20. You have this awesome idea of trying to pair up your 'submissive' male friend to a 'dominant' male.
With a very distinct few, all the ideas under the cut are homophobic. The fact that the ideas that aren't homophobic are contextualised in the meme above renders them just as disgusting and infuriating.
Most of the time, when I see criticism of fandom, participatory culture and slash, I read with interest even though I am not the target audience (usually there is a whole lot of misconception and mistakes in talking about fandom - we're not all straight and we're not all women, to start with. Just saying), but the criticisms of appropriation, misogyny and fetishism are ones I do read. I read them with the knowledge that these things happen far too often and are not called on (at all or enough) in fandom.
So let me say it like this; As a gay woman, as a queer fangrrl, as a consumer of slash; reducing gay men (be they real or fictional) to a piece of meat over which one writes their masturbatory fantasies, reduces, diminishes and marginalises me and my sexuality and my culture and every other gay/lesbian/bisexual/trans/queer woman (and man) who chooses to participate in male oriented fandom.
Food for thought, that.
