Pride Month already?!

[eumelia]

Wow, I haven't updated in almost a week!

Well, here are a few fun things to know. On Sunday and Monday (in which [Southern!Girl] was around and much fun was had) was the annual LGBT Studies/Queer Theory conference An Other Sex.
It was great fun, like all conferences, some panels and lectures were better than others, but nothing tops seeing all the various types of dyks, fags, fag-hags, butch, femme, genderqueers, transmen, transbois, tranwomen, transgrrls, bykes, omnis and everything under the sun and rocks.

That and I got to actually be a part of the proceedings by being a simultaneous translator, along with a fellow dyke, for the Keynote Speaker (Prof. Lee Edelman) who wanted to hear the panel conducted in memory of Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick (z"l) who passed away this past April from breast cancer.

I think next year I'll feel confidant enough to maybe read a paper of my own.
Here's to hoping.

Funnily enough, one of the speakers was Prof. Nancy Pollikoff who spoke about Marriage and basically why we should be rid of it. Now, I had planned to write my own spiel about why I think Marriage should be abolished, but thanks to _yggdrasil, I don't need to, because she linked to shemale's brilliant post on the matter:

I've said this elsewhere, but never really made a post about it:

I don't support marriage.

For anyone.

Or, to be more clear, i think that it shouldn't be an institution with any legal merit. To give even more slack here, i don't think that it should hold exclusive privileges over any other kind of relationship... Although its discriminatory history and present make me inclined to think that it should be considered, legally speaking, completely irrelevant.

The exclusive bundling of certain rights and protections leaves those who can't get married, or don't have that type of relationship or family structure that they would feel comfortable with that kind of ceremony but who do need some or all of those rights and protections, in really shitty situations. And it always will.

Go read the rest.

Something else that comes to mind and that I'd been meaning to link and write about is rm's post about how women are really constructed in our culture(s) - because despite the various geographical and historical differences in Patriarchy this principle holds true everywhere.
Women are not themselves, they are for others.
I'd quote the whole thing but it's better to go with the link and read the comments as well:

The first time I worked clinic defense was the month after I turned eighteen. Now, most people stood in a particular phalanx by the clinic door, especially during the worst of the protests. The phalanx was designed to make sure protesters couldn't crawl through our legs, that there would still be a barrier if they stuck us with pins, which, yes, they did. Then, there were the people stationed inside the clinic, if it had interior doors. Sometimes women would pose as patients and lock themselves to the interior doors, blocking them. Finally, there were the people who escorted the women in and out of the clinic.

I did all three of those jobs at various times, but mostly I either guarded the inside doors of the clinics or escorted patients.

Mostly, the women didn't talk. But sometimes they did, either about nothing in particular or dark humour. It was strange, responding to them, and always being so careful not to reveal any particular sentiment to them.

"I hate this," one woman said. I couldn't but nod, because "this" could have been anything.

She kept talking. "Always being escorted, like I can't go to the doctor by myself."

"I'm sorry, sometimes the protesters pose as patients; it's for everyone's safety."

"But I feel like a child."

And it's true.
I know for myself that I'm asked often in an exasperated tone, "What happened to you?", to me.
Why am I no longer the happy go lucky angel I used to be.
Why am I obsessed with the fact that my hair is a cause of uproar in the family - if it's long it's beautiful, if it's short it should be grown, when it's shaved I'm being deliberately provocative and upsetting my parents and going against all the values I should uphold.

And while I don't use my hair or any part of my body to be deliberately provocative, it happens anyway, because my body being feminine is public and my heart and mind are queer*.
And so long as these facts remain true (most likely for the rest of my life) I will do my best to very deliberatly fuck with the status quo.

It makes me happy.

Happy International Pride Month My Pretties!

*Thank you rm for that turn of phrase.

Comments

[http://users.livejournal.com/_yggdrasil/]

OMG, stop reading my mind, bb.

Also, did you catch the comment in rm's thread that I replied to, the person who started arguing with me, asking why do women let themselves be oppressed? I laughed.

[tinyrevolution.livejournal.com]

oh wow, do I wish I was at that conference!!!

Is it actually named after a Dana International song or is Sex Acher just a common phrase?

[quicksilvermad.livejournal.com]

I read through the post (and the comments).

...

Okay, I'm 23 years old, straight, pretty attractive (so I've been told), and I have super long hair. There are a couple places I'm going with this, so bear with me.

First off, I agree that it fucking sucks to be escorted all over the place. And we are. Because I've done what a few of the others have commented about—the whole thing about cars. I know how to check my oil, change my tires, and re-fit loose belts. I learned how to overhaul my engine. How? My mom's grandfather owned a mechanic shop and she used to work for him. So my mom taught me. And my dad taught me some of the other stuff since he used to work as a mechanic at Texaco (WAAAAAAAY back when every gas station offered full service including tune-ups). But I still get that "get the fuck outta here, you're a chick!" face when I start talking cars. Even with guys who've been my friends for years.

Because they see a pretty face, long hair, and a set of tits and think: "Nope, she only knows how to giggle cutely and get herself free drinks." (which I have NEVER done)

This information—the fact that I'm well-versed in "guy talk" is something that actually terrifies most men. To the point where, despite that pretty face, long hair, tits, and slender build, I've never even been on a date. I'm 23 and I've never been kissed. I'm 23 and I'm still a virgin.

Then there's that. Why is there all this pressure for women to lose their virginity? Why do I feel obligated to go around, grab the first cute guy I see, and have a meaningless fling just to get the damned experience out of the way? I can't... It just doesn't make sense. I really like guys—because I can talk to them. I can swear and joke all I want and that's what probably scares them away. Because all that packaging I'm wrapped in disappears and I just become one of them. And I hate that I have to change myself in order to appeal to men. Sure, I love dressing up and looking pretty—but it's a fucking hassle. I shouldn't have to do these things. The fact that I can speak "man" should be something that draws men to me, not away from me.

What was my other point? *scrolls back up* AH! My hair.

My hair comes down to the middle of my back. I prefer wearing it shorter, but there's that caveman mentality that prevents me from cutting it all off again. I remember talking about getting a haircut with a group of my friends (this was back in high school) and one of the guys piped up with "NO! Jesus, don't ever cut your hair!"

Excuse me?

Back then, my hair was almost waist length. I went to college the next year and chopped it all off. Result?

Guys didn't like me as much.

So I'm changing myself like a peacock to get attention. It's desperate and sad and I hate myself for it, because I don't want to end up alone. All my friends are meeting and marrying and leaving me behind to become that spinster aunt whose nieces and nephew play video games with because she's not like Aunt Becca or whatever my brother-in-law's sisters' names are she's the "fun" aunt.

[lilacsigil.livejournal.com]

Go you!

but nothing tops seeing all the various types of dyks, fags, fag-hags, butch, femme, genderqueers, transmen, transbois, tranwomen, transgrrls, bykes, omnis and everything under the sun and rocks.

This is why I miss living in a city! Not that there's no visibly gay people in the country (*waves*) but the vast majority move to the city. I miss seeing that variety of people.