My body... my soul...

[eumelia]

I was on the Pill for two and a half years, I started taking it because I was put on the anti-acne medication Roacutan, those of you in the know, know what this drug can do to your body and specifically your liver.
I am fine, just by the way, since I was on the drug three years ago and I have no scars on my face to attest that I was even on so harsh a drug.
My back on the other hand... *shrug*, nothing I can so about that, it's the way my body is and that is fine, in fact it's perfect, who wants to be flawless anyway!
Any how I was on the Pill, for two and a half years... it didn't really do me any good other than regulate my periods.

My periods.

I used to feel very ambivalent about my periods;
on the one hand for years I have used those bleeding times to get in touch with my body and use it to not only physically cleanse myself, but spiritually as well; I mean what better time to do some "house cleansing" than when your body is doing it anyway.
On the other hand, ever since I was thirteen (and during my Pill shtick), four to seven days out of the month I would be doubled over in pain or alternatively, if I couldn't express my pain physically, I would go off on a "bloody" tirade and become the bitchy-cunt people learned to fear and loathe... except my friends since that was just Mel on the rag and nothing more.

But see, it is something more.
I very much believe in a spiritual self, a soul, and I do not believe it is separate from my body. My body and my soul are one and complete (yeah, I don't believe in soul-mates, the whole concept is dated and out of touch with the reality that people face in their day to day lives).
During teenage hood, and I've said this before, we are so totally unaware of who we are and what we are capable of, this is especially true for girls, since society doesn't encourage us to become the best, merely the mediocre (I am thankful to come from a family of strong women and "silent" men).
When I got my period, there was no big deal, my mom gave me some pads and my dad brought home a box of mini-tampons for me, since I was swimming at the time. My sisters said congrats, my brother ignored the whole thing.
I wanted a big deal.
You see by that time I had read all kinds of things written by Le-Guin, McCaffery, Zimmer-Bradley, and other great women writers who spoke about the Moon Blood as a holy thing.
In our society (as in western) women's blood is dirty, but blood shed in war is sacred.
"Let us remember those who shed blood in this field" I do not know who said this, or if it was even said or paraphrased by anyone, but that is the gist of what I'm saying.

Why is blood that gives life, that is comparable to the sea as it moves with the tides, considered unclean and the women during their bleeding periods "dirty" and "unstable".
While blood that is shed through violence, death and sacrifice revered, even glorified.
I find the mentality behind those sentiments absoloutly abhorrent!

Practically the month I went off the Pill, I went off tampons as well.
I got a Mooncup.
I am in love with that little silicone cup, which collects my blood.
For the past three months I have become very close to my Vag.
Since the cup requires up close and personal roaming around there, I had no choice but to become extra acquainted with the most misunderstood body part of the human body.
I love my Cunt.
Ever since I've taken the "alternative road" I've become a whole lot more attuned to my body, my soul and all those things that go with it, intellect, sensuality, sexuality etc.

Mel is a whole lot happier the way she is than she was a month ago.