Last night was the bomb - maybe literally

Last night Shira and Shimrit got my welcome back party done and it was great!
Most of my friends came, those who couldn't had really good reasons, ya know Finals at Uni, serving in the reserves at the Army.
I suspect we saw some missiles being fired from somewhere (we looked up to the sky and saw a few fiery trails that could not be fireworks) but wherever they landed it was no where near where we were since we didn't even hear them trail in the air.

It was amazing seeing so many of my friends again, there was lots of junk food and good ole' Israeli Pizza (which is just like American only a little thinner and without so much cheese).

So it seems I'm "officially" back.
I suppose I'll have to stop slacking off and actually plan to do something, like, hmmm, maybe register for college, see if I am actually able to afford traveling again, and just stop procrastinating.

I'll be doing all that tomorrow :)

Anxiety

No anxiety episodes as of yet, which is very surprising, since I got extremely worried when Tiberius was hit, since a good friend lives there.
Fortunately he was in the Centre and not in the North this weekend.

I keep waiting to start crying. It's what I do when I'm anxious, it's my release mechanism, but I'm not feeling it.
I feel very disconnected from the whole thing.

I hate Nasrallah, really, really hate him.

Some mood music

I'm listening to a very appropriate song by an alternative band called Smile Empty Song.

It's called ( This is War )

I feel this song is a criticism of war. The mood of the song is very dire, making it sound like the speaker (the soldier) has no identity other than that prescribed by the atrocities of war and that everything in his life is less important than the demands his country place on him during war.

In the militaristic country I live in this is very true.
The lives of thousands of reserve soldiers have been put on hold.
The lives of their families have been put on hold.
This entire country is, as I have mentioned, in now in the shits because of this situation, which coulda', woulda', shoulda' been avoided.
But it's too late now and we have to fight.
The international media depicts Israel as a monster, because we are so much stronger than Lebanon when it comes to military means.
Israel tried to act as humanely as possible, if we really wanted to over-react we could have destroyed practically the entire country, instead we target specific location in order to cause as little collateral damage as possible.
This is at least the way I see it.
I find the whole situation abhorrent and find the deaths of Israeli soldiers and the aiming of missiles towards Israeli citizens equally awful and I may cry. I find the murder of Lebanese citizens so awful I may cry as well.
There is no way for Israel to come out "okay" in the eyes of the media, because no matter what our reaction would have been it would have been viewed as an over-reaction, simply because Israel's military power is greater than Lebanon's.
What I feel the media is missing is the way Hezbollah uses the Lebanese as their cannon fodder, as their storage stations, as their own personal guerrilla strong holds.
Guerrilla tactics are unpredictable and there is no way to fight it with out causing damage that I carnot even begin to contemplate.
I really want this to be over.

Please.