eumelia: (Default)
Eumelia ([personal profile] eumelia) wrote2009-03-04 11:27 pm

Homophobia... yeah... THAT!

I'm really frustrated.

I want to write about what I'm going through, because it's important that this sort of thing not be silenced. However, this is also an internal family thing, to do with my parents and my brother's wedding.
I don't want to vilify anyone.
Because I love everyone in my family, I'm very lucky to have them.

I suppose that's why the situation is so hurtful.
I thought I was safe from Homophobia from the home.

Homophobia isn't a matter of opinion. And it isn't about what other people will think.
It's about believing that there are different standards for people who are involved in same-sex relationships.
It isn't about someone thinking I'm a pervert.
It's about the fact that I'm expected to either be out or be quiet - unless I'm advertising my sexuality of course, which only Queers can do because when it's everyone else (i.e. Heterosexuals) it's okay to hold hands, dance around and basically declare the fact that they are straight.
But that's not advertising.
That's "normal".
I'm sick of normal.
I just want to be.

Wish me luck.

(Anonymous) 2009-03-04 10:25 pm (UTC)(link)
good luck (I mean that...)

Rony

[identity profile] eumelia.livejournal.com 2009-03-04 10:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you very much!

[identity profile] nurint.livejournal.com 2009-03-04 10:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Good luck!

I think you have on one of your icons that sentence from Princess Bride - "you keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means"? Narrow minded people tend to be like that with using "normal" when they mean "normative", trying to suppress the simple fact that deviations from the average in a group consisting of more than one member are, in fact, quite normal.

[identity profile] eumelia.livejournal.com 2009-03-04 10:56 pm (UTC)(link)
I do not have an icon like that... but I think I need one :)

[identity profile] nurint.livejournal.com 2009-03-04 11:12 pm (UTC)(link)
You don't? Funny, I could have sworn one of my friends had it, and you seemed like the likeliest candidate.

[identity profile] ladyperegrine.livejournal.com 2009-03-04 11:37 pm (UTC)(link)
I like this icon (the one about breaking rules).

[identity profile] qilora.livejournal.com 2009-03-04 11:15 pm (UTC)(link)
go get 'em, sista.

*hugs*

[identity profile] eumelia.livejournal.com 2009-03-05 11:15 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you!

*hugs*

[identity profile] ladyperegrine.livejournal.com 2009-03-04 11:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Best of luck to you. I hope your family will understand.

[identity profile] eumelia.livejournal.com 2009-03-05 11:16 am (UTC)(link)
I'm pretty sure that eventually common sense will win out, simply because it is the simplest solution.

[identity profile] lifeofresearch.livejournal.com 2009-03-05 03:40 am (UTC)(link)
I have a cousin that came home one day and found her daughter in bed with another girl. She contacted me expecting advice on how to change her daughter. I surprised her by saying that her relationship with her daughter was more important than her daughter's sexual orientation. She took my advice and now she says she has two daughters since her daughter is in a monogamous relationship for the past 7 years. So I wish you good luck and I believe your parents will come around. Just be patient and give them time to accept you as you are not as they want you to be.

[identity profile] eumelia.livejournal.com 2009-03-05 11:16 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you very much.

[identity profile] tamara-russo.livejournal.com 2009-03-05 05:48 am (UTC)(link)
Good luck... *word* \^^/

[identity profile] eumelia.livejournal.com 2009-03-05 11:16 am (UTC)(link)
*hugs*
ext_8002: (Default)

[identity profile] tinyrevolution.livejournal.com 2009-03-05 06:16 am (UTC)(link)
It's about believing that there are different standards

so true.

I don't want to vilify anyone.
Because I love everyone in my family, I'm very lucky to have them.


I think I know what you mean ... it is hard to be accountable to everyone/everything sometimes.

But I can tell you are brave, and I wish you the strength to deal with it all.

[identity profile] eumelia.livejournal.com 2009-03-05 11:18 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you very much.

It really is the double standard that is the most hurtful.