eumelia: (queer rage)
[personal profile] eumelia
Originally posted on Tumblr.

I have a co-worker, whom I hate. I would say the feeling is mutual, but I suspect she’s too thick to notice.

She’s one of those people who think they’re funny, that they have insight on matters of life, the universe, and other people’s business.

We’re a small group working together, and we work long hours. Obviously, casual talk will commence, especially when many of us have a lot in common - geekery and gayness being some of them.

I’m out as gay at work, on my team there are two other gay guys, and we’re a majority women team (including my boss, who is a woman), so my workplace has been very comfy for me, woman wise and queer wise.

This co-worker has been making my workplace hostile.

Earlier this week one of the parents’ at the office brought their baby to work. He was a big hit among everyone.

Obviously when there’s a baby in the office we start talking about babies, and the having them, or not.

I mentioned that it was fun to play with them, but it was so much more convenient to give them back at the end.

This co-worker said, “well, you’ve said you didn’t want a family so maybe it is better for you.”

Family

I was hurt deeper than I expected. Yes, I’m an out dyke. Yes, I mentioned that I don’t intend to have biological children, or adopt any. That doesn’t mean I don’t want a family.

That I don’t have a family.

I was erased by her words, her mind cannot entertain the idea of a family that isn’t a heterosexual one made out of parents and their children.

This happened days ago and I’m still thinking about it. She isn’t worth my time of day, I know this. I shouldn’t even think about what she said.

And yet, in her eyes, I’m not a real person.

That cuts deeper than anything else.

Date: 2013-01-03 07:54 am (UTC)
lilacsigil: 12 Apostles rocks, text "Rock On" (12 Apostles)
From: [personal profile] lilacsigil
To people like that almost nobody is a real person - only people exactly like them. It makes me think of my co-worker, who is generally an okay person, but deeply and horribly racist and thinks that so is everyone else, so as long as only white people are in the shop, it's okay to say racist things, because of course all white people think like her. Despite issues with IQ testing, though, there do seem to be strong links between stupidity and bigotry, and I think that's how that kind of person works.

Date: 2013-01-03 08:42 am (UTC)
anotherslashfan: sign reading f... (blotted out) censorship (Default)
From: [personal profile] anotherslashfan
That is a harsh thing to say and I would probably be unable to forget it, too. But she is WRONG and even if you got her acceptance now, what would it be worth, really? Hope you can let it go a bit... although it's unfair that she does something stupid and hutrful and only you have to deal with the aftermath.

Date: 2013-01-04 04:56 pm (UTC)
green_knight: (Hug)
From: [personal profile] green_knight
It _is_ hurtful, but I don't think there's a way to make her see that. Sorry you have to put up with this :-(

Date: 2013-01-03 12:52 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] amethystfirefly
Ugh. That's just really horrible of her to say. -hugs-

Date: 2013-01-03 02:15 pm (UTC)
adafrog: (Default)
From: [personal profile] adafrog
{{{hugs}}}

Date: 2013-01-03 02:34 pm (UTC)
trouble: Sketch of Hermoine from Harry Potter with "Bookworms will rule the world (after we finish the background reading)" on it (Default)
From: [personal profile] trouble
My whole government seems to have that attitude. "Hard working Ontario families" have kids. So I guess we don't have a family.

My point being I'm not sure if that's a microaggression because the attitude is so pervasive and so ingrained and it's both very wrong and so hard to get away from.

Date: 2013-01-07 03:20 am (UTC)
trouble: Sketch of Hermoine from Harry Potter with "Bookworms will rule the world (after we finish the background reading)" on it (Default)
From: [personal profile] trouble
A pro-life org is getting an award next week for it's hard work in the struggle to maintain a demographic majority (I kid you not)

... wow. I am so, so sorry.

Date: 2013-01-03 02:58 pm (UTC)
green: (religion: shalom/peace)
From: [personal profile] green
Privilege and assumptions and STUPIDITY. That's what that is. I'm so sorry, bb. I know it hurts, and to her it was just another throwaway line that she's forgotten by now. >:(

*hugs*

Date: 2013-01-03 05:40 pm (UTC)
yvi: Kaylee leaning against Inara (Firefly - Kaylee& Inara comfort)
From: [personal profile] yvi
Wow...

*hugs*

I wish we could just generally start using the word "family" more for people without children anyway. Husband and I are a small family, but we are family.

Date: 2013-01-03 08:49 pm (UTC)
silveradept: A kodama with a trombone. The trombone is playing music, even though it is held in a rest position (Default)
From: [personal profile] silveradept
That's cold. And, I'm guessing, the fact that they didn't realize the gravity of the insult only makes it all the more harmful.

We're sorry. Would that we were all farther along the path of respecting others.

Profile

eumelia: (Default)
Eumelia

June 2015

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V and Justice

V: Ah, I was forgetting that we are not properly introduced. I do not have a name. You can call me V. Madam Justice...this is V. V... this is Madam Justice. hello, Madam Justice.

Justice: Good evening, V.

V: There. Now we know each other. Actually, I've been a fan of yours for quite some time. Oh, I know what you're thinking...

Justice: The poor boy has a crush on me...an adolescent fatuation.

V: I beg your pardon, Madam. It isn't like that at all. I've long admired you...albeit only from a distance. I used to stare at you from the streets below when I was a child. I'd say to my father, "Who is that lady?" And he'd say "That's Madam Justice." And I'd say "Isn't she pretty."

V: Please don't think it was merely physical. I know you're not that sort of girl. No, I loved you as a person. As an ideal.

Justice: What? V! For shame! You have betrayed me for some harlot, some vain and pouting hussy with painted lips and a knowing smile!

V: I, Madam? I beg to differ! It was your infidelity that drove me to her arms!

V: Ah-ha! That surprised you, didn't it? You thought I didn't know about your little fling. But I do. I know everything! Frankly, I wasn't surprised when I found out. You always did have an eye for a man in uniform.

Justice: Uniform? Why I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about. It was always you, V. You were the only one...

V: Liar! Slut! Whore! Deny that you let him have his way with you, him with his armbands and jackboots!

V: Well? Cat got your tongue? I though as much.

V: Very well. So you stand revealed at last. you are no longer my justice. You are his justice now. You have bedded another.

Justice: Sob! Choke! Wh-who is she, V? What is her name?

V: Her name is Anarchy. And she has taught me more as a mistress than you ever did! She has taught me that justice is meaningless without freedom. She is honest. She makes no promises and breaks none. Unlike you, Jezebel. I used to wonder why you could never look me in the eye. Now I know. So good bye, dear lady. I would be saddened by our parting even now, save that you are no longer the woman I once loved.

*KABOOM!*

-"V for Vendetta"

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